#BodyPositive: Vidhi Talks About Self Love and Artificial Beauty Parameters!

I believe there is no objective definition of a “good” body or a “perfect” body. As an individual when I see young girls around me who starve (literally) to lose weight so as to “fit” in their peer group, it disheartens me, for the fact to what level of idiosyncrasy and loss of self confidence have these girls gone. Social perception and the desire to be universally accepted can make people take extreme steps and they are not always for the better. Why our self esteem is so easily affected by what people think of our body? Is the world actually this shallow? Or fitting into societal norms is the only way of feeling good about ourselves? It’s shocking to see how these cliché and stereotype opinions of what is “beautiful” or what is “fashionable” prevail in the society. A society, which benchmarks our “freedom of expression” only on papers. 

I have been skinny for most part of my life. Thanks to the repeated comments and taunts from my family, extended family, friends; it was quite early in my adolescent years that I had developed a boundary wall to repel all sorts of statements that came bombarding me. Yes, I was scoffed with the cliché things like “Khati nahi hai na kuch isliye”, “Do you buy clothes from kid’s section?” (I am 5’7 and I really salute people’s sense of approximation of height and weight. Good lord, not even petite, kids? Really?). Before getting into the gravity of the problem, the first thing people need to understand here is, if someone is skinny that by no way means she/he doesn’t eat or is starving or is anorexic. Trust me, of everything else, what hurt me the most was when one of my college friends told me “Are you sure you don’t have anorexia?” I was shunned into pieces. My self confidence shattered in a whiff of second. Getting accustomed to my body was not big an issue as it was to my skin. I was born with a terrible skin. And I hated it. The biggest struggle in my life was getting my skin in order. I always ran away from pictures in marriages, parties etc.  I was very envious of other girls who had a skin to die for. 

I must confess it took me a lot of years to finally sink in the fact that it all incepts from your mind. People look at you, the way you want them to look at you. Not that my skin has changed much or improved till date, but what has definitely improved is my confidence. And to say the least, now when someone tells me “Oh! What are you doing for your skin?” My first response is “Exactly the same thing you are doing for your brain” Rude? No. Necessary? Yes. 

A perfect body/skin is basically grounded in a mind set. Coming from a family of doctors, I surely am not in favour of being unnecessarily fat and obese, for it has a lot of bad consequences on your health. But being healthy, most importantly, should be the idea of a girl of every age. If you hear you’re fat or skinny from people around, you’re likely to believe so.  Believe what your heart says. Acceptance of your body shape and type and understanding its diversity will get you a long way with confidence and maturity. 

Embrace yourself.